"The Purple Hour" In the Hazy Light of Healing

You know that time of evening

where the sun has almost just set

but a tiny glimmer of its light remains

still

all the shops have turned on lights

and their neon rainbow melds

with hazy lingering slivers of sunlight

a few hours earlier is deemed by photographers

"the golden hour"

but this hour is less golden;

more characterized by indigo's and purples

than golds

I found myself driving tonight during this "purple hour"

in a city I'd promised to hate since I was a kid

in the heart of that very city

the one I live in currently

but promised I never would

I made the trek here three years ago

once plan 'A' fell apart in a blunder;

I was trepidatious at first

but still jumped in with both feet

and soon found myself making a life

nesting into jobs and friends and favorite grocery stores

and this city turned out to be everything it promised to be;

tenatious

and eager

yet old fashioned

and odd;

a place with no place for me

and lately I've been hurt by it

and I've been tired of it

and I've needed space from this place

that's left me with some scars

But I was driving through it

tonight in that indigo hour

and the summer wind and neon lights and fireworks stands

filled me

lightened me

reminded me

excited me...

That restaurant where I had my birthday

that welcomes you like a scene from

an old black and white film

that street where we all danced

unabashed and unafraid

dressed as dinosaurs and princesses and villians

that row of houses

where the trees are a hundred years old

and so many of my students live

that one place

with great fries and salads

where friends have planned futures

and laughed

and cried

that street lamp

that he kissed me under

and I kissed him back

those twists and turns of sidewalk

where I tried to run

but usually just briskly walked

and counted my steps

and strengthened my pace

and pushed my limits

that building

where history still stands

and brick looks grand

and grandma and grandpa

had their 50th wedding anniversary

the temple that burned but was so lovingly rebuilt

lit up in a warming buttery light

that pierced through the darkening

--this one filled me most--

with hope of rebuilding

and excited my very core

with what's to come

And suddenly I realized,

I'd forgiven it

that though it had misplaced me 

and been unwelcoming of me

I have finally embraced the city

and it finally embraced me

Have you ever let a place help heal you?

Well,

thank you, you odd, old fashioned city

for teaching as you have

for letting me learn by trial and error

and leaving me with scars to remember by

but also with an embracing of love and faith and hope

my soul's all warm and fuzzy

and ready to be okay with where I am

in this city

in this life

in this time

So here's to that purple hour

that magical, hazy, healing hour;

it's when the sun sets on yesterday,

and you're on your way towards

tomorrow.